PAUL EDWARD COSTA

Effexor Withdrawal Variation

A seasick clarity 
washes over me 
when I, for a moment, 
hear musical movements made 
by the percussionist on the other side of it all, 
           but somehow still nearby, 
when he shakes 
my faith’s skeletal remains 
like a rainstick design upending cause and effect, 
dropping dry thorns through me 
as leverage moves minds 
and emotions try moving 
Newgrange into alignment 
with new constellations. 

Then a brain-based electric sensation 

It’s the chess piece realizing their war 
is one of solitary opposition 
to the two kaleidoscopic clossi above them 
as their compatriots are too attached 
to the thrilling satisfaction 
of being lifted through the air before landing 
and displacing 
the fellow being they see in their way 
through a worldview 
in two dimensions’ easily digestible 
binary code. 

Now the woozy quality of caffeine withdrawal 

so let me be a type 
who accepts their flaws and acknowledges unpleasant tendencies inside 
enough to adjust those habits, 
or at least harness them to a purpose 
so that I won’t spend each moment spewing speech at top volume, 
drowning out 
the strident, feedback-formed entity I’ve become
like all unfortunate enough to be within earshot do 
as I dance on flower beds, 
asserting my right to pleasant aromas 
while holding a butterfly in cupped hands 
one twitch away from being crushed 
so no one dares interrupt 
my inert flow of motion, 
all to let me dream at night of being 
someone nurturing life without ego, 
discharging perfume from each pore, 
whose music—frequently requested— 
                         is always in rotation. 

as these head swimming hand tremors at the heart of irritation come down

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